Great piece, as usual. Might I add something: a more suitable title would be ‘could men be feminine’ rather than feminist.
Feminism refers to the idea that women should be entitled the same rights as men. Since it’s an idea, anyone could adopt and advocate for it, regardless of gender.
That said, what you’re advocating for is a form of feminism. Feminist justice seeks to construct a society whereby there are no ethical norms set by gender.
There’s indeed a particular spiritual violence exerted on men if they’re more feminine than usual. That’s because we have strong social intuitions that tie gender norms with behaviors. But we’re quite fortunate to live a world today where this violence isn’t as pronounced as in the past (or in some societies).