I am envious of your ability to concoct this piece with (dark) humour, sincerity, and wisdom. Your story sheds light on the internal conflict many of us have at this time: the tension between personal and interpersonal space.
“Between a person coughing and our desire to shoot them there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and our power to not socially shun them like scumbags. In our response lies our ability to leave the loop of judging our community members as morally inferior to us.”
Insofar as we want to "shun them like scumbags," there's a part of us that wants to practice restraint, i.e. compassion.
Very enjoyable read, Carlos.